From Today On, I Am Counting “Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter” (2012) As Part Of The MCU

(WARNING: This blog contains spoilers for “Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter (2012)” as well as some MCU spoilers. You have been warned.)

Last eve, I went over to a friend’s house and we watched a movie. I was given the choice of “Saw 3” (2010) or “Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter” (2012). As someone who doesn’t like horror movies – at all – I, of course, said “Abraham Lincoln me the fuck up”.

And Oh boooy did I make the right decision.

This movie was a god damn treasure. If you never have seen it than I highly encourage you to go over to Hulu and watch this because it is a masterpiece. It is well worth the hour and 45 minutes. I did not expect to have so much fun watching it but it just kept getting better. Here is the trailer in case you have no clue what I’m talking about.

Between the bast that was Walmart-brand A listers (except you Anthony Mackie, love you), the killer music, or the CGI fight scenes that were so bad they were amazing, this movie might be my new comfort movie. I would watch it every fuckin’ day.

But I do have to add that I have a theory. I must mix it in because I talked about this with my friends and now the world must know it. I -from this day until my last – will be counting this movie towards the Marvel Cinematic Universe. You cannot tell me no any longer.

This movie has two big Marvel people in it. We have Anthony Mackie as Will Johnson (Abe’s childhood friend/advisor/assistant Vampire Hunter) who would go on to play Sam Wilson AKA Falcon/Captain America. Then there is Dominic Cooper as Henry Sturges (Vampire/Vampire Hunter/Fashionista) who played young Howard Stark in the MCU. So what I am suggesting is that these two are in fact playing their MCU characters here but this is just the first movie in the MCU, seeing as it’s set in the 1800’s. Here’s what made me believe this:

At one point towards the end of the movie, while Will (Mackie) is fighting some vampires on the train, it looks like he was bit by one of the vamps as he shot it. I am under the theory that Will was bit and turned into a vampire. (I couldn’t find anything confirming it but it’s my theory). As we learned from Sturgie (Cooper)’s tragic back story, vampires are immortal. Sturgie at one point hints that he is well over 500 years old. Therefore, if Will was bit, he would be alive when Sam Wilson comes to become the Falcon. Same goes for Henry Sturges to Howard Stark. Not to mention, the names are similar. Will Johnson to Sam Wilson, similar with the “Will”s. Then Henry Sturges to Howard Stark, same initials.

Also, say, if Bucky’s original arm was made of, say a titanium-silver alloy then that explains how he used it to kill Howard Stark – vampires (in that universe) could be killed by silver. We don’t know if vampires could be killed by vibranium seeing as it was hidden by the Wakandan’s until the 1940’s.

Not to mention, there is a whole ass sequence in the film where Abe is holding Will’s leg as he dangles off the side of a train so he doesn’t fall off into the rocky wastelands below. Parallel?: Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes baby. Here’s the sneaky clips:

Big brain theory: Sam Wilson and Howard Stark were Will Johnson and Henry Sturges back in the 1860’s but after being in a bit of a spotlight around Lincoln, they hid in the shadows following his death. Sturgie went on to have a wife and kid about 100 years later after assuming the identity of handsome genius Howard Stark. Will Johnson became Sam Wilson and joined the army to later become the Falcon/Captain America. Thus making “Abraham Lincoln; Vampire Hunter” (2012), the ultimate prequel of the MCU.

Boom.